Every once in a while I get a little fed up with social media. (Those of you who know me well know that by “once in a while,” I mean “every other day.”)
“So, what’s bothering you about social media today, Maggie?”
Boy, am I glad you asked.
In all honesty, a lot of things bother me about social media, but today we shall focus on one particular trend that I am pretty well done with.
“What trend is that, Maggie?”
(Shout out to my imaginary interviewer, you’re really helping this discussion along.) The trend is that of “goals.”
Recently I have been noticing an alarming amount of comments along these lines:
“OMG, YOU ARE GOALS!”
“Ugh you guys are so adorable; y’all are beyond goals.”
“#relationshipgoals #lifegoals #allthegoals”
And no, I did not conveniently fabricate these, I copied them from my Facebook and Instagram feeds.
I would like to first address the misuse of the noun “goal” – which is either a sports term referring to one team scoring a point on another, or an objective that an individual or group sets about to achieve. You cannot be “goal.” You can be lovely, or smart, or funny. “Goal” is not an adjective. ANYWAY.
Here is my problem with “goals” – I don’t have one. I like goals. I am a fairly task oriented person. I thoroughly enjoy crossing things off my list; in fact, I’ll add things to my list that I already did just so I can cross them off.
My problem with social media goals, though, are just how superficial they are. What kind of person earnestly seeks this ambition: “your face is goals.” What does that mean? What are you doing with your life? Trying to get her face? Unless you are loaded with plastic (being credit cards and surgery), this is a completely unrealistic and unachievable goal. Why would you even have such a goal? It is futile.
But the problem extends – not only have you robbed this person with the goal-face of a kind compliment, you have belittled said individual to something to have, not something to admire. I think we all agree people are not possessions. Women hate when men objectify them, so why do we do it to each other? Furthermore, goals are set to be conquered. Your weird attempt at a complement is, in reality, quite condescending and rude.
Let’s actually think about what we have to say about our friends. What if we replaced “your face is goals” with “you are beautiful.” Why don’t we dig deeper in our relationship and set goals of transparency, honesty, and respect?
And can we have a moment of silence for whoever thinks their friends’ cute couple photo makes them “beyond goals?” This one just.. makes me sad. Her relationship is beyond your goals? What kind of goals are you setting for your life that make her boyfriend’s prom-posal (gag) surpass them? I’m not trying to insult your friend’s relationship – I’m sure they are wonderful people and love each other, and whatever (actually I’m not sure, because I don’t know them, but let’s keep moving). My concern is for you, girlfriend.
I don’t know if anyone ever told you this, but there is more to life than dating. There is more to life than marriage. I don’t condemn those things; I think when properly and biblically pursued, they are both beautiful vehicles to show us God’s love for us and Christ’s love for the Church, and that’s only the start of it! But singleness is not the end of the world. And I certainly hope you are dreaming big for yourself, sister.
Listen, all I’m trying to say here is that I hope your dreaming bigger than some other girl’s face or another’s relationship. Consider what you are communicating when you say those things. “Think before you speak” is not a bad place to start.
But here’s what I’m really trying to say: I hope you are setting goals that scare you. I hope you are chasing dreams that make you quiver with excitement. I hope you are doodling in the margins of your notes about whatever it is that makes you tick. I hope you are ready to work hard to reach your goals and see your dreams come to fruition.
I hope you are pursuing your passions and trying to follow God’s will for your life. I know you will probably keep making “goals” comments, because they are funny. I get it. But I still hope for you to make better, bigger goals. If not today, then someday.
think and live well, but love best.